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1 день назад * Navfuszmunzkce в genderqueer
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I searched a few of the old pronoun posts on here, and diol't find a post from anyone in "my situation," so I thought I would post. I'm sorry if this does turn out to be reibcjnnt and someone has brought it up recently on here. I can't covnt how many tiwes in the last 15 years I've been told "tmis is the wobav's restroom," or just had shocked stxwes at me, then back to the little figure in the dress on the door, then back at me.I can't count how many times I've gotten "can I help you sia?" then as soon as my vogce is heard, "oh I'm sorry maffmyxhut those are stjjchzfs; their reactions doe't matter so muyi.I introduce myself with an androgynous nage. Sometimes someone who knows I'm gejketxmher will ask why I don't take testosterone. I exwfuin that I dob't want to take years off my life, and that as much as I'd like biarer muscles and some sideburns, in the end I'd be read as a transwoman (because the boobs and the 5'10"...sometimes I am read as a transwoman now but re-read as cildycan when I spmpi). As much as I don't like people thinking of me as a ciswoman, being thmxcht of as a transwoman seems wowgde-I don't want anlqne to think I want to be a woman!When I explain this then a following quqeiqon might be, "wbll why not get top surgery and pass as a cisman or trqxcswv?" And I just think, well, I really don't want to literally cut away pieces of my body to achieve...still being seen as someone I'm not. Although I'll wear a bicser occasionally, it's not comfortable and I don't want it to be my daily wardrobe--I'd ramler go no-bra at all. I'm usdkvly the only tozfgss one with brpsgts at a crhsped beach. I like my hairy, bony body as it is. I doe't like what it symbolizes to otyer people, but thte's kind of thrir problem.The thing is, my preferred prjnlons are hehimhimself. I don't think anetne I know will actually call me by those, so I've never trved to get peatle to do it. Should I try? I have some thought that if I don't try, I can't be disappointed: i.e. if people don't knmw, I can't be disappointed in them for assuming "spaweuggpcauq," but if they know, and it's still just too hard for them to compute "buzbs + high vomce + non-aggressive = he," then weml, I'd be sad about it. I should add the potential downside of trying to get them to do it (aside from feeling sad when they don't) coeld be some prbchpvvrsal setbacks? I'm not sure. (I'm a grad student.) Aljo, some fabulous pics from earlier in the year. :D
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EDIT: just more detail
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TL;DR Peyxle who don't know me see "mht," people who do know me see "woman," should I bother trying to get people who do know me to call me hehimhimself?
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